Criminals and Car Washes

Dream

Mark ‘Marky  Mark’ Wahlberg is a criminal, and Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson is a law enforcement officer. The dream starts just after they've had a battle of some sort and have now both retreated to their respective bases to recover. Jeremy ‘Doesn’t have a Nickname” Piven is Wahlberg’s senior accomplice, or crime mentor, or whatever. Anyway, he was captured and Wahlberg is worried that further pursuit is coming for him. Then he remembers that it's the day when the fire department washes there vehicles, so he doesn’t have to worry (the firefighters enforce the law in a sort of Fahrenheit 451 sort of way). Cut to the fire station were a raucous bikini carwash is in progress. It would seem that the fireman take there wash day very seriously and invite all the local attractive/exhibitionist women over to help (or maybe they were hookers, it’s not really clear). There is plenty of water getting thrown around, but most of it is getting on the women and not the fire engine.  The chief and some other senior officers are in a hot tub and their women are topless, or possibly even naked. You don’t see anything explicit though since two of the women are low enough in the water that it obscures their chests and the third is sitting in a guy’s lap and he is cupping her breasts (still probably enough for a PG-13 though). While this is going on an agent from internal affairs arrives with a troll enforcer (as in a full on fantasy troll: massive ugly dude with a large club). When the chief notices that internal affairs has arrived he starts to make a fuss, but the agent coolly informs him that he doesn’t have to worry, implying that he has already lost his job. The agent starts talking to one of the senior fire fighters about Mark Wahlberg. Apparently Wahlberg and Piven are ID Forgers. The ID’s are meant to allow them to pass at a younger age so that they can compete in the Hunger Games (what their motive is I couldn’t tell you). All young people are required to report to the fire station for volunteer duty, and a good way to check the validity of an ID is to see if it shows up in the fire departments records. Piven was caught this way, but two weeks ago Wahlberg had gotten into the records somehow. The agent accuses the firemen of registering him without sufficiently checking his ID, and orders the troll to attack. Suddenly the troll is at least two stories tall and is attempting to smash the firemen with its club while they scramble to avoid the blows. The firemen try to hide from the enormous troll and that is where the dream ends.

Analysis

As a movie idea, I see a lot of problems with this idea. For one, there is a startling lack of focus. Where was Johnson during all this? What was being done to Piven? What is a troll doing in a dystopian future movie? I guess the car wash scene is showing that the firefighters are incompetent, but I don’t see how that justifies the internal affairs agent killing them. Is the agent our true antagonist in the movie, and if so, are Wahlberg and Johnson eventually going to team up to take him down? I just can’t tell where this is going.

Auguries

Bikini car washes seem like fun, but they will end in tragedy.